corner view: motion

Posted on January 29, 2014 by Cole | 4 Comments

Corner view is a weekly Wednesday gathering, originally hosted by Jane, now by Francesca. A topic is given and you can see impressions; be it photographic or writerly in form, from around the world. Come see the world’s corner view via the links on the sidebar!

Snow days have definitely become more fun since moving to South Carolina- and today’s was the first time I’ve sledded in 20 years and the first time the girls have ever sledded. Between Kite Hill sledding, hot chocolate with sprinkles, a breakfast at a local bakery of french toast made from raisin challah, bacon, a nap, a round of Candyland, a homemade pizza and movie to come, and a paid day off safe and home with my family in my flannel jammies, and a snow storm that will clean up after itself…well I’m feeling incredibly grateful, loved and safe. Perfection.

corner view: The colors of January

Posted on January 22, 2014 by Cole | 10 Comments

corner view: a good read

Posted on January 15, 2014 by Cole | 4 Comments

Hello friends! It’s been far too long and I figured I best just jump back in!

These days most of my reading is snuck in throughout the day. No more leisurely chapters read in bed, or the bathtub or in the backseat of the car. Now my reading is more non-traditional in format, audio-CDs in the car while I’m driving, online with blogs and websites whether they are parenting, photography, cooking or Down syndrome/disability awareness, audio-stories from the library while I run. I’ve always been a book lover, but with three small children running underfoot- their books are about all we get to these days that involve any actual page turning. What I most frequently look forward to browsing with a cup of coffee are Huffington Post parenting articles. I find myself nodding along with the stories of other people’s lives. Although even with all the saturation in technology, I still find myself happily buying actual books that are recommended or I’ve really enjoyed electronically. Still nothing beats the happy weight of an actual book in your hands. Especially cookbooks. Lord knows you can find almost any recipe on the internet nowadays and food blogs are some of my favorites- but often I just have to have the hardcopy in my pantry.

corner view: self-portrait

Posted on November 13, 2013 by Cole | 8 Comments

31 for 21: day 30: corner view: all the small things

Posted on October 30, 2013 by Cole | 7 Comments

Go:

The delicate lock of strawberry blonde hair that grew swifter than the rest and swirled on top of her sweet newborn head eventually growing to a lengthy thickness that she barely lets me run my fingers through these days. The soft arch of her eyebrows that curve delicately together over the sparkle in her deep blue almond eyes. The petite rounding of her small nose that just now at four and a half has the smallest smattering of freckles skipping across the bridge of it. The big apple cheeks that pull back wide and smooth with each grin that comes from her mouth that is a mirror image of my own. The contagious giggle that the baby has clearly caught and imitates when they are together. The practiced interpretive dance of her starfish hands as they come together in explanation of her tenacious speech approximations. And then their tight grip as they fist around my neck and pull me down to her, with soft, warm palms as she leans her face in close, nose to nose and cupping my cheeks asks if I’m sad. The fury in her well-articulated “No Mommas” when she hears me say it’s time to brush her hair, do her bite-bites, go potty or turn off Barney. The delight in her questioning tone and gesturing hands that she puts up to her chest in a question of inclusion when I suggest we go to the park, the store, make cookies or read a book. The mischievous turn of her head back over a rounded shoulder as she lets me in on whatever rascally prank she’s gotten away with. The hesitant stomps and claps as she stands behind her sister mimicking her dance and cheer moves. The plaintive tone of her cries for, “My Momma” as she collapses in frustration on the kitchen floor when I leave the house too quickly on a weekday morning without her. The rounding of the consonants and vowels as her sister’s names rolls off her carefully positioned tongue in her seeking of them while they still sleep early each morning. The soft hum of pleasure that she unconsciously sings whenever there is bread or cookies with dinner. The persistent insistence of time for swinging the minute we get out of the car at the park. The persuasive and hopeful tones dancing on her lips as she tries to distract us from nap or bed time with a request for one more book. The focused myopic daily search through her dresser drawers for a bit of purple to wear with her ensemble. The happy whispers as she pats the pillow next to her at nap time urging me to not just kiss her night-night but actually lay down with her. The cheer of excitement at the suggestion of just about any activity that includes all of her family as she runs to tell her sisters all about it. The firm and confident look she pierces you with as she stands her ground waiting for you to catch up to her intention.

These are all the small things that I think of when I picture her dear face througout my day.

Stop.

31 for 21: Day 23: Corner View: Sacred Spaces

Posted on October 23, 2013 by Cole | 11 Comments

Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again. Joseph Campbell

31 for 21: Day 16: Corner View: last but not least

Posted on October 16, 2013 by Cole | 8 Comments

Go:

“Do you think the Quail understands that you’re having another baby?” The teacher asks doubtfully as she eyes my obviously pregnant belly on my way into pick up the girls after work. She isn’t the first to wonder this and even though we haven’t hidden the coming household changes from her I had to wonder myself what the Quail would think about no longer being the baby of the household. Pondering about these familial shifts while being oh-so hormonally pregnant had never gone well for me. I distinctly remember crying to my own mother over the phone when I was newly pregnant with the Quail over Zuzu’s impending fall from grace- her change from the one and only to the elder. From being the center of all our attention to now being part of a set. Now the Quail would shift her role as our fawned over baby to the middle child. Now we would meet a new little person who while, so very similar to ourselves and our girls would in equal parts be her own little individual self. Her future self unknown to us. The discussion of this upcoming baby was a daily event. Plans were made for what we would call her, where she would sleep, what she would eat, what toys the girls felt willing to share, where she would go to school. Zuzu talked endlessly about her coming baby sister while the Quail listened on to these discussions, unable to actually put words to her own thoughts on the matter. The Quail, she learned quickly to sign and say baby, to pat my belly along with her sister, to whimper and bear witness to her Momma’s morning sickness as it morphed once again into all-day sickness. And then one day, a mere week from my impending induction it occurred to me that more important than the upcoming introduction to this little one was the notice that Momma & Daddy would be gone for a couple of days while Gramma took over. As far as the Quail new, the talk of Gramma’s visit meant an extra person to pour the kefir and read Chicka-Chicka Boom, Boom; not two less.

As we sat on the bathroom floor in the evening light, brushing her teeth I started to say the words that I dreaded, that in a little less than a week, Momma & Daddy would be going to the hospital to get this baby out and bring her home to keep. How Gramma would be staying here with her and her sister just like she did when we went to the hospital to bring her home and again when she had surgery on her belly. The Quail, as I talked, her bottom lip took its signature position pushed out from the top as her eyes welled up and she reached her arms around my neck tight. Then just as quickly she leaned back, patted my belly and signed baby. Finished with our discussion she hurried around me to her room pulling her duck-duck lovies behind her, ready to sleep.

The next week we finished our Easter Bunny cake decorating and went to the living room to start Barney. As we loaded our bags into the car Gramma sat with one girl on each side. Assuring us that all would be fine.

Later that night in the hospital room I laid on my side feeling Sugarplum, kick, kick, kick her way around my belly as the monitors recorded her sweet heart and my contracting middle. I wiped away a tear knowing that this letting go and growing was just part of life. Our life, as a family. That these moments of tears would wipe clean the space where another heart was to live. That our family would be complete with the arrival of dear Sugarplum, at last, but not least.

Stop.

31 for 21: Day 9: corner view: before & after

Posted on October 9, 2013 by Cole | 4 Comments

Go:

“Which book do you want to read?” I ask thumbing through the shelf of colorful children’s books in the girl’s room. The two older girls, used to the routine shout out approximations of titles as they push past me to grab the latest Junie B. Jones and seasonal antics of Clifford and George. The baby teeters on the edge of the bed railing, surely tempting fate as she grins at our far-from-soothing bedtime routine. Lovey comes in and we settle ourselves into the bed for a few minutes of minding our storytime manners. I hear of families that read for an hour or more to lull their loves into slumber and that is not us. Not our lot in life. As difficult as that may be to bear for a bookaholic and aging philosopher. These children barely sit still long enough to turn the page in a chapter book. To make it to the Good Nighting of the moon is the equivalent of a Kilimanjaro climb most nights.

When Zuzu was a wee nursling in my arms I tried to do what the “good parent” books prescribed. I would find a sleepy Sandra Boynton rhyme to read to her as she settled into my arms. Her tiny fists grabbed those board books and whipped them away from us before Little Pookie could tell us what was wrong. Later as I would settle her at a safe arms distance in front of me I’d let the swing rock her to the sound of my voice. As soon as she was old enough to make her protests understood she would take the book back from me and insist on “reading” it herself. Storytime at the library, one of my most treasured childhood memories was a flaming disaster. As other children were rapt with the Librarian’s multitude of voices, I chased Zuzu, angling my body so she could see the stern look on my face as I retaped the decorations back to the wall, alternating that sternness with apologetic glances to the other mothers. Eventually I gave in. It was too much and frankly wrecking my nerves right along with my happy childhood memories. So instead we went to the park, to gymnastics, to the bouncehouses and we let Zuzu be the one to “read” to her babydolls instead.

When the Quail came along though, it was a different story. Oh how she loved to be read to! Her small voice would answer with a tiny moo to Ms. Boynton’s question of what a cow says. Once the words on the page formed a pattern for Zuzu, she would take it upon herself to slowly work her way through pieces of our treasury letting the Quail fill in when she could.

Along came Sugarplum. Once you sat down on the floor, she would back herself into your lap and reach to turn the pages along with you. As long as you were reading only to her. Her protests of little No’s rising up over our rhyming as her sisters would now come running to the parent parked at eye level. Come bedtime, she’s the first to dogpile her sisters as they line up their loveys and blankies for the night’s rest. “Storytime Manners” is the code word reminding everyone to pause. To listen. As one by one we share our part of the story. The read to becomes the reader. The baby becomes the school-age child. The childhood dream reshapes itself into the present day.

We try a little harder to pause a bit longer as the newly-minted seven-year old stumbles through a page of Junie B, holding out the picture to her sister who in turn, press her hand to her own chest. “My turn.” Insists the Quail as her parents yawn and suggest only 2 more pages. The Quail practices her site words as they float up from the Boynton books. “Red hat. Green hat. Blue hat. Oops.” Her ‘s’ sound magnified in her effort to enunciate each sound she sees. The baby claps along with us in praise of her sister’s accomplishment before lunging over the side of the bed railing yet again, caught up by her ankle at the last possible second before we insist it is time to rest one last time.

Stop.

corner view: roadside from corner to corner

Posted on October 2, 2013 by Cole | 16 Comments

This little package has bumped its way along many a roadside here in the US and throughout the world. My pals with the corner view posts had a wonderful idea to pass along a little good tidings from one of us to another in a friendly circle. See, Joanne, sent a lovely tenugui to Francesca. Who thought it might be fun to pass a little something on to Jane, wrapped in the same lovely wrapping. Soon we all wanted a turn to give and receive in real life from our friends we visit in cyberland on a weekly basis. So Corner to Corner was created and the lovely Kelleyn, who received the tenugui from Tzivia, wrapped a few items for me to take time to myself with and sent it on my way and in a few short days I will pass the love on to Karyn, in New Zealand with a little something of my own making and so on and so forth until the tenugui with it’s string full of well wishes winds its way back around the world to Joanne who will; for all her kindness and foresight, receive these well wishes, knowing that her gift that kept on giving is still in the hands of dear Francesca who will keep the gift once it has completed its circle. Got all that? No? Well here is a link to a better explanation of Corner to Corner.

I’ve been looking forward to my turn for quite some time now and when I saw the envelope in my mailbox my heart beat just a bit faster. Sorting through the cards and seeing the handwritten notes of my friends that have only existed on-line until now just made the connection we share of photography and prose from our corner view of the world all the more real and special. What a delight to be a member of this creative circle. A creativity that until just a few short years ago I had not routinely expressed. This blog has become a very special place for me and the folks and conversations and experiences I have had because of it are just so special to me. I joined corner view 4 years ago with this post on the color white. Out of all the ways I’ve tried to organize my blog- Corner View has remained the most stable over the years. Even when I go through a period of feeling uninspired; a sure way to get back to writing and sharing is to start with a corner view topic.

Love to you all and here’s to many more years of the view from our corners around the world coming together!

corner view: what to do in the U.S.

Posted on September 25, 2013 by Cole | 4 Comments

When in the U.S., take it all in from sea to shining sea. The U.S. has so much to offer and it is extremely difficult to sum it all up. Travel by plane, trane or automobile and take the time to wander in as many of the regions as you can. The land and city-scapes are so wide and varied, as are the people, the towns, the food and the sites. Even after living here for over 40 years there is still so much that I’ve yet to experience!